By EsquireLife

October 28, 2018

You Can’t Afford Me…

We all know that person that always wants to penny pinch.  There’s nothing wrong with saving a couple of bucks.  But at the end of the day it’s only a couple f#@&!%G dollars. You’re not saving a whole lot, you just want to feel like you won.  Your dumb a$$ is so programmed to ask for a discount it just makes you sound so f#@&!%G stupid, and you embarrass everyone around you.  We have to learn how to over come these tight a$$ customers, this also pertains to you f#@& heads.  You need to stop giving in to your dumb a$$ customers, because if you give in to your customers you end up being their little bitch.  You just got SOLD, instead of selling them.

I’m Not Saying Be Expensive,

But your dumb a$$ has to be competitive.  All these f#@& head entrepreneurs or should I say “Want-Trepreneurs” are so quick to be the cheapest on the block that either they get too much business that drives in the cheap a$$ customer and you’ll end up giving quantity over quality. Or you’re too cheap in price that people question it and don’t go to you.  Which one do you get?

How much money will it make me, not How much money does it cost.

I see this all the time and talk to these idiots everyday.  “No one is going to want to pay those prices.” Are you f#@&!%G Psychic?  Good, think this way and I will take all your business.  Even when you call me to ask for my consulting pricing you say, “Oh that’s too expensive.”  Then stop window shopping me you f#@&!%G idiot.  It might be too expensive for you, but the guy before you that purchased is crushing you because he wasn’t a little bitch like you.

Let Your Customer Fall on Their a$$.

I wouldn’t let my customer drop me, I will drop them.  If a customer is always telling you, you’re too expensive, then agree with them. “You’re Right, I’m Expensive. So if don’t want to buy, please move out the way because the person behind you does.”  Let the customer know they’re not paying that much money when they have quality.  I already spent my expensive time and research to give you a great product.

That will Shut them the f#@& Up.

Customers want what they can’t have. You need to sell those motherfuckers hard and don’t f#@&!%G talk them to death.  When a customer comes to you, they already know what they want.  Trust me before they even pick up the phone they’ve already done all the research on you.  They’re just calling to try to SELL YOU, you dumb a$$.  You need to sell them first and let the customer do all the talking and let them hear themselves tell you why they want you.  They will convince themselves and all you have to do is ask for their credit card number.

“I Know I’m Expensive, Do you Want it Yes or No?”

You know 50% of the answer, you just need to ask the f#@&!%G closing question, Do you want this, Yes?  If the customer comes back with the famous line, “That’s too much money,” just shut them up with, “Yes I know, it’s expensive, but the person before you didn’t think it was and purchased 2 from me.” What is your excuse?

“It’s Not that I’m Expensive it’s that You’ve Never Bought Anything of Quality Before.”

Do you want something that will fail on you, or want something that will last?  Then shut the f#@& up and buy.

I Sell to the Rolex Customer

One of the services I offer is to customers that own Rolex Time Pieces.  A customer that owns a Rolex will never question price because they’ve already invested in their Quality Luxury Timepieces.  This is why my customers don’t question my price when they buy my Phantom Protect Luxury Watch Guard.  I now have 4 time repeat customers and guess what, not once have any of my faithful customers asked for a discount.  They know quality and don’t question price.  You need to relay that to your customer.

Now if I provided a service for Invicta watch owners, then holy sh!T I’d have a sh!T storm of cheap a$$ complaining customers, because they didn’t invest in quality, only in a piece of sh!T watch.

“But, I Have Picky Customer”

That’s your fault you f#@&!%G dumb a$$.  You let your customer run your business.  A lot these idiots I talk to always say, “I have Picky Customers,” as if that means you have a quality customer.  No you dumb f#@&, that means you have a customer that runs you and your business. You’re their puppet and you let them rule you.  Stop acting like a pu$ and run your business like a d!

“Your Cheapest Customer will always be your Pickiest.”

Why, because you let them get away with murder in your business.  They feel because they sold you they have control over you and feel they deserve better treatment then others.  Don’t treat your customers like Divas, treat them like employees.  When you tell a customer to show up at 8:00am, they better f#@&!%G know to be there at 7:45am.  My customer always know, “If you’re on time you’re f#@&!%G Late.”  You come to me because I’m the expert and I’m not your little bitch.  Walk away, you know I’m the only one that can satisfy your wallet.  You’re the Expert not the customer.

Stop Following Up with your Customers…

You chase your customer like a little bitch.  The only time I will follow up with a prospect is to close the deal.  Once I get you on the phone, and you tell me is NO, then I’m off to the next.  I always leave the Ball in their court.  Leave them thinking on why they need you.  Stop whining to them how you’re the best.  They know you’re the best because they called you and you have to reinforce that.  When you ask a woman to be your girlfriend and she says, “No,” do you chase her like a little puppy and keep telling her you’re the best for her.  f#@& no, you look for someone better and hotter than her and get the bigger sale.  Trust me she’ll come back to you, they always do.  But by that time you’re now driving a Bentley and not the Toyota Camry she was.

You’re Scared Like a Little pu$

Stop being a little pu$, you lower your prices because you don’t know how to sell.  You’re just a coward that you don’t like hearing the word NO.  No is a powerful word, you need to learn how to over come it.  90% of my customers are f#@&!%G losers not because they say No, but because they don’t have any money. Theses idiots just want to show off to other men because they must be homosexuals and like to talk a big talk.  But when it comes down to putting their money on the table, their d!

The word “No” Will get you Better at Sales

Here comes all the f#@& heads.  But No means No.  You’re right, especially when you’re trying to get some a$$ from a woman.  Yeah you mother f#@&3r it’s call rape you f#@&!%G criminal.  In sales it’s different.  They’re a couple of things No means in sales.  It’s either your customer doesn’t have a full understanding about you.  Yes I said, You, not your f#@&!%G product.  The customer buys you… So you have to let them know how your product will benefit them.  If they can’t see themselves using this then they won’t buy.  They don’t f#@&!%G trust you, this is why they don’t buy either.

Listen to your customer and find the “Need behind the Need.”

There’s a reason why they’re in front you of.  Example… You go a restaurant to eat, of course you idiot.  But why?  I’ve haven’t eaten since yesterday because I’m too busy lowering my prices and dealing with f#@& head cheap a$$ customers… So that is the need behind the need.  Your f#@&!%G a$$ is starving.

I Have No Money or Credit.

This is another reason why people don’t buy from you, you get a cheap a$$ customer with no money.  They can only afford $5.00 but they’re trying to buy something to $10.00.  Next time you want to see a broke person, look at three things.  There watch, belt, and phone.  There watch will be a Invicta, belt will be a Gucci, and phone will be a Android.  Broke people try to perpetrate that they have money when they don’t.  You need to find out from the beginning if they have money to spend. Broke people spend their money on wrong priorities.  They will buy a $300 designer belt but won’t spend $500 to buy a new set of tires for there Toyota Camry.

Be Honest and Say you’re Broke

I rather get a “No I have no money,” then you trying to stroke me and act like you can afford.  Audemars Piguet Royal Oak, some of you fu#k3r$ don’t know this brand because you don’t know quality Time Pieces.  This is going to be my next purchase, and I can honestly say I can’t fit this in my budget right now.  I didn’t say I can’t afford it, you dumb f#&Ks. Of course I can afford it, But I have financial obligations like a homes, cars, my priorities are right.  I also like living under my expensive roof, unlike some of you idiots that rather have an expensive car you can’t afford and live at home with your mommies because you don’t have to pay rent or food because,

You still Suck on your Mom’s t!t.

When I tried on the all Gold Royal Oak, I was the happiest man in the world, but when the jeweler told me it was $52,000 I knew that I would have to make this a future purchase.  First of all I didn’t sound like a bitch like you and say, “That’s too expensive.”  I know quality and craftsmanship of AP watches so I just told the jeweler, “Not right now because I don’t have the budget.” The jeweler appreciated my honestly and he even called me 2 days later and let me know, when I was ready to come see him.

I knew the price of the watch before going in, and at the same time I wasn’t there to haggle like a bitch.  I wanted to practice walking in the store and saying,” I’ll take it.”

Don’t Be Scared to Walk Away.

That’s the problem with you b!t

For every 5 No’s you will get 1 Yes.

You better stop stroking those 5 Losers and find that 1 customer that will stroke you.  You scared little bitch.

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